By Will ("The
Thrill") Viharo
THRILLVILLE BEAT
By Will "the Thrill" Viharo
EXPLAIN THIS FOR ME...; "FRIENDS" OF BIG
BROTHER? BEST THRILL-SANCTIONED FLICKS OF 2003; THE THRILLVILLIAN
CANDIDATE!
"GOODBYE, BALL..." Before I get started on my
latest rant - all fez hats off to
Art Carney, who
starred in one of my all time favorite shows,
The
Honeymooners. Man, it's been a year of great loss. There were
positive things, too, but before I get to that...
MEMO TO THE RIGHT...
We on the Left - even the relatively middle Left like myself - are
often accused of being nutty, non-sensible and out of touch with reality. Hm.
Given the fact that so many people seem to be leaning rightward these days, I
am exploring the possibility that perhaps the leftys' humanist perspective of
equal rights for all - straight, gay, male, female, agnostic, atheist,
religious, black, white, GRAY, etc. - is perhaps a wee bit outdated in the current
climate of imperialism, materialism, and the recently renewed epidemic of
blindly faithful, religious patriotism. Maybe "God" DOES intend for ALL
Americans of every stripe to be White, Christian, Uptight, "Pro-Life,"
"Pro-Gun," "Pro-War" and of course, no matter what, "Pro-Bush."
Before I admit my wrong-headedness in denying the validity of that
last statement, kindly explain a few simple things for me:
- Recently,
your boy
W, signed the
bill banning late-term abortions, without regard for the
mother's health, the first step in this administration's inevitable march
toward overturning a woman's right to choose, based on their own religious
beliefs, even though the
First Amendment to the Constitution clearly gives us freedom
from religion as well as of religion. Supporters argue any type
of abortion is "murder." Yet, these same supporters applaud W.'s bullheaded
determination to send
hundreds of young Americans to their graves in so-called
defense of the same Constitution they are
ignoring with this latest bill. The upshot seems to be:
"fetuses" are worth preserving, but once Americans reach draft age, they're
selectively expendable, and their own demises are somehow justifiable, whereas
a woman whose life is threatened by the impending birth of her own baby is not
of general concern. Likewise, foreign babies and adults killed by our
bombs and bullets are stoically written off as unavoidable "collateral damage," with no karmic bills in the mail. W. says
freedom is "worth dying for," yet neither he nor any members of his family, nor
any relatives of any Congressional Republicans, are placed in the actual line
of fire on the front lines. Our cowardly leaders decide with whom and when to
wage war, without truthfully explaining why, then we the people pay the price -
both in terms of life, and the budget deficit. Who's actually making the
"sacrifice" here, and for what? Also, many people out there who are
anti-abortion are also pro-gun - even though guns kill many more children in
this country annually than doctors do. Many of these patriots take the
Bible literally, even though it clearly states in the
Commandments, "Thou Shalt Not Kill." In none of the myriad
translations of this text are any exceptions sanctioned. But you seem to know
where this divine line is drawn. Please explain this logic to me. I can't see
it. I am blinded by the hypocrisy of it. Maybe I'm wrong, though. Maybe it's
good to be "wrong." One last question related to this topic: since you're
against homosexuality, birth control and abortion, is your answer to
overpopulation WAR?
- Many of you went along with a
disgruntled white
millionaire's crusade to replace Gray Davis, on the grounds he ruined
California's fiscal status and didn't know what he was doing. Yet, many of
these same people are contributing to the
re-election of a
president who took a well-balanced national economy and turned it into a
gigantic deficit it will take generations to pay off, based
purely on his administration's radical re-invention of America as an
imperialistic war mongering empire. You also replaced Davis with (another)
inarticulate man who has NO clear plan whatsoever, and who is himself a white
millionaire, and a movie star, claiming to represent "the little people." This
makes no sense to me. Perhaps I am missing something. Again, explain the logic
here, please. Like
James Brown,
I'm begging for some light here - "Please, Please, PLEASE."
- You claim the media is "Liberal" and also defend our supposedly
collective "Freedom of Speech" every time you open your mouth to support
the War. Yet anyone who opposes your viewpoint is called insane,
traitorous, and un-patriotic. You love Arnie but despise Sean
Penn and Johnny Depp, who don't even have the gall to actually run for office.
You don't like Ronnie being accused of homophobia, despite his outspoken
religious beliefs in this regard, so you lobby a network to
cancel a mini-series based on his life. If this country is
really "free" for ALL its citizens, why do you suppress and vilify those who
speak out against the status quo? Explain.
- If it's "un-American" to criticize or even question George W.
Bush, then wasn't it equally non-patriotic to impeach
Bill Clinton - especially when he gave us two terms of
relative peace and prosperity, which meant he was doing his job better than the
current guy? By your narrow definition of Americanism, isn't the Oval Office
beyond reproach, no matter who is sitting in it? Or does your assessment only
apply to Republican presidents? Or is Sex somehow more deplorable than Murder
in your view? Explain, and good luck with that.
Now, here's one for
the Left, especially Democrats holding office:
- The Republicans actually impeached a Democratic president for
getting a blowjob. The sitting Republican president (and I do mean
sitting) has been linked to scandals involving big business, the
CIA and more, plus he outright
lied about his reasons for attacking another country and occupying it, and yet
- you voted to give him MORE money to continue this charade of a crusade? WHY
HASN'T HE BEEN IMPEACHED? Bush is ruining the economy, and he appointed an
Attorney General who is the worst witchhunter since
McCarthy, busting
people merely for selling bongs. Bush's boldly chauvinistic administration is
slowly unraveling
Roe V. Wade. He callously defends the tragedy of soldiers
dying daily in an unjustified war, based on the false premise of an imminent
threat which has already been thoroughly debunked. (HE LIED ABOUT THE
WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION - and who really cares? This astounds, baffles
and saddens me to no end.) This wealthy
frat boy, born to a
world of entitlement, snubs the world community with his preppie cowboy
arrogance - and yet, you still support him and barely criticize him, restricted
by the same fear tactics and greed-mongering that ensures conservative control
of what is supposed to be an eclectic democracy. Explain - but do it quickly,
because I am this close to going Independent.
I'll be waiting. But I won't be holding my breath, either.
WITH "FRIENDS" LIKE THESE...
If I'm out of touch with the mainstream, so be it. A lot of people
around me like Arnold. A lot of people apparently like W., now matter how many
lives he destroys with his megalo-maniacal policies. A lot of people believe
the war in Iraq is a valiant struggle for "Freedom" (at least for white,
SUV-driving right wing
Christians). A lot people find reality TV shows engaging, believe hip hop is
musical, think
big
fake boobs are sexy, prefer the bland remake of Ocean's
11 over the classic original, and watch the long running hit show
Friends. I don't fit into any of these categories. I can't help it,
sorry. But I don't actively begrudge anyone's opinion. Not just because it
would be "un-American." But because it would be disrespectful of my fellow
human being's right to express themselves any way they see fit.
It's a big world, and Thrillville is just a teeny, tiny
part of it. What difference does it make what I like or what I think? None. So
why am I putting it out there? Just for the hell of it. Plus, I think everyone
likes to have their opinions officially recorded, even if they're ultimately
meaningless. It's fun and engaging and often enlightening to exchange
perspectives, and to announce one's own position on any given issue. It gives
one the illusion
their existence somehow makes an impression on the universe.
It also feels good that I follow the beat of my own drummer. Like
it or not, Hip-Hop is the music of contemporary culture, though it means
nothing to me personally. So what. I respect it as a culture (especially for
those who need it as a form of creative rebellion and survival), even as I
reject it as a sound, which simply grates on me. And hell, maybe Friends is a
good show, since it's been on so long. I just wouldn't hang out with any of
those characters in real life, and I can't get past that. So long as no one
tries to force me to go with the flow, people are free to disagree. But
sometimes I wonder if even something as simple as our cultural tastes are being
slowly and subversively determined by an evil corporate mindfuck...
Recently, I was watching
TV and suddenly the show on
the screen switched to an episode of Friends. I
panicked, since the channel hadn't changed. I didn't sit on the remote or
anything. I began switching stations and to my absolute horror found that
every channel on my 500 plus digital network was simultaneously
broadcasting KTVU's airing of
Friends!! Even my beloved and sacred TV Land, home of Mister Ed,
the most sensible (and entertaining) being on the boob tube!! This bizarre and
horrifying technical mishap - if that's what it was - only lasted a few brief,
terrifying moments. But it smacked of corporate takeover and other frightening,
Big Brother type brainwashing. A world where the only show on TV is the
abysmally whitewashed blandness of Friends? How is that possible? And
then I pick up the paper and read the words "Governor-elect Schwarzenegger,"
and sadly realize my dreams of a compassionate, sensible world are history, and
anything is possible. Fight the Power - next time Friends takes over the
entire cable network, turn off the TV and throw on your favorite DVD or CD! Of
course, if both of those are Friends, too, it's too late, the evil power
grab has already infiltrated your sanctuary. Wake up now before it's too
late...
THE MOST THRILLING FLICKS OF 2003
This has actually been a pretty good year for movies. People tag
me as being exclusively retro in my tastes, but that isn't the case. I dig
Style, and Good Old Fashioned Cheese, too. It so happens these elements thrived
simultaneously with the heyday of the drive-in (50s-70s). And Melody was big in
Music during the jukebox era, too - and for me, Melody is a must. Nowadays it
all seems so derivative and conformist, not to mention hostile, empty,
unimaginative and pretentious. But that's just my perspective. There are still
good things going on in the current culture: The Sopranos,
DVDs, CD box sets, and digital cameras are all way cool in my little book.
There are also movies coming out now in theaters I will (if I don't already)
actually want to own in my ever-expanding collection. They all have Style
and/or Cheese to burn. Included here are my favorites of the year 2003, even
though it's not quite over. I might add a couple more next time if I catch
anything worth mentioning over the holiday season besides the flu. I highly
recommend all of these, but if you don't share my tastes - that's okay with me,
too. Just my two cents, for free. Here goes:
- DOWN WITH LOVE
Like Far
From Heaven, this contemporary classic re-creates a specific (and long
gone) cinematic style with such precision, dedication and love of craft that it
transcends its retro roots, creating something both modern and magical. I never
thought I'd love a movie so much that stars mainstream minions like Renee
Zellwegger and Ewan McGregor, but they absolutely shine in this
flawlessly conceived and executed tribute to all three Rock Hudson/Doris
Day classic comedy collaborations (Pillow Talk, Lover Come
Back and Send Me No Flowers). David Hyde Pierce - star of
another show whose appeal escapes me, Frasier - nearly out-Randalls
Tony Randall. The space age set designs and period fashions, not to
mention the swingin' soundtrack featuring everyone from Sinatra to current
crooner king Michael Buble, pulsate with colorful glamour, like a
Shag painting come to life. This is the Ultimate "Lounge" Movie of the
21st Century, Just perfect.
- THE LOST SKELETON OF CADAVRA
Okay, so
even my modern tastes tend toward the retro - can I help it if our grandparents
had more style than we do? This movie has finally found a distributor (savvy
Mike Schlesinger of Sony, a regular Thrillville supplier, snapped
it up) after knocking around a few years on the film fest circuit. I have a
screener my pal Gary Meyer gave me, suggesting it for Thrillville. It's a
dead-on homage to/parody of 50s sci-flicks from Cat Women of the Moon to
The Astounding She Monster to The Brain From Planet Arous and
more seemed to good to be true, though I thought the obscure B movie references
would limit its audience. Sony thinks it will make a big splash a la Big Fat
Greek Wedding, a crossover sleeper. We'll see if American moviegoers are
that hip, but it's destined for Thrillville anyway, once the mainstream
have had their chance at it. It does for atomic age space alien sagas what
Young Frankenstein did for 30s Universal horror - not quite as
brilliantly, but damn close. It's simply hilarious, shot in beautiful B&W
(on DV) for maximum authenticity, marketed as a "lost" film from the golden
years of the drive-in. Trying to lampoon something that's already campy - like
Robot Monster - is no mean feat.
- AMERICAN
SPLENDOR
Equally perfect and almost the opposite stylistically and
content-wise, this wonderful adaptation/documentary of the life of Cleveland
schmoe Harvey Pekar - who writes a self-published comic book about his
own life, which I've read avidly for years - is as inspiring as it is
depressing, as entertaining as it is illuminating, and as honest as it is
creative, mixing actual interviews with lovingly recreated scenes of Harvey's
real (comic book?) life. It's all here - from the obsessive jazz record
collecting (echoes of Ghost World, which this resembles as much
as it does Crumb), the perpetual rainy day ambiance, the daily
grind, the failed relationships, the surprisingly successful marriage, the
David Letterman debacle, and even the cancer survival. An instant and high
profile cult classic based on another underground cult classic from a different
medium. Now that's an accomplishment.
- BUBBA HO-TEP
When people first
told me about this flick, I couldn't believe it actually existed. I mean -
Bruce Campbell as an aging Elvis fighting a mummy in a Texas rest
home? With Ozzie Davis as a living JFK? How could such a wild, offbeat
concept translate into an actual movie that actually gets released, especially
in this safe, pre-marketed era? Well, it finally scored some limited
distribution after killing at various film festival screenings - all of which I
regrettably missed. I finally saw it this past October, and it was well worth
the wait and totally lived up to both the premise and the hype. This is a Great
American Movie. Bruce proves he is a terrific dramatic actor as well as a
choice ham. There are elements of Ash here but basically, he's All King. It's
touching, too - and philosophically provocative. The bandaged monster here
looks a lot like the Aztec Mummy, too, another plus. "You don't fuck with the
King, man." Beautiful, baby. TCB from here to eternity - but watch your ass.
- KILL BILL
I used to hate
Tarantino until I realized it was just jealousy. I mean, he was a video store
geek like me, yet he translated his geekiness into a mega-successful
movie-making career without any apparent creative compromises. Now I recognize
and appreciate his genius without envying or denying it. He's One Of Us Who Got
Over, and with this flick, he proves once and for all his goal is to be the
Ultimate Exploitation Filmmaker, not Artist of the Millennium. This first
volume of his epic tribute to everything and everyone from the Shaw
Brothers to John Woo to Sergio Leone to Seijun
Suzuki also features his greatest musical compilation. The soundtrack helps
carry the film and fills in the blanks with aural ammunition. I especially dug
his use of "The Green Hornet" theme by Al Hirt, and spaghetti western
staples like "Death Rides a Horse" over samurai slaughter scenes. I'm
positive Volume 2 will be one of the best of 2004, too. Notice how I haven't
even commented on the controversial violence. If it bothers you, don't see it.
I found nothing offensive about this flick, except that it ended. It all works
in the hyper-real context he's concocted for the slight story, with the accent
more on action (and editing) than dialogue this time. Once you get used to
that, it's one hell of thrill ride through B movie history.
- ONCE UPON A TIME IN MEXICO
Another pulpy action
masterpiece from a guy who knows how, Robert Rodriguez, fulfilling and
far surpassing the promise of the earlier entries in this trilogy with a
surreal hodgepodge of epic gunfights, Mariachis, double crosses, secret agents
and Santo-style gangster/monster fantasy, with yet another quirky
character turn by the greatest actor of his generation, Johnny Depp.
Plus my old pal Mickey Rourke is looking better than he has in a while.
More Salma Hayek would've been nice - but when wouldn't it? You can't
get enough of her even if you try. Killer stuff.
- THE HULK
I was surprised by how many
people didn't like this beautiful blockbuster. Sure, it would've been better if
it had included some of the classic super-villains like The Abomination
instead of having Hulk fight his own fucked up dad, but they're promising that
for the next installment. It falls short of Spider-Man in terms
of faithfulness, but not pathos and certainly not special effects. This is the
best CGI I've ever seen, and I'm not a big fan of the stuff. It's a bit slow in
the build-up but surprisingly, emotionally sincere, and the pay-off comes in
the grand action scenes which are truly awesome. The innovative comic book
style of editing was also a big plus. Ang Lee deserves kudos, not criticism,
for humanizing the monster so effectively, in sync with the whole point of the
source material. Some flaws in the telling, but overall, a hulking success, and
the sequel will be even better, I predict, now that all the background drama is
out of the way.
- HOUSE OF 1,000
CORPSES
There's no middle ground here - people either love this flick or
hate it. Okay, there's some middle ground. I didn't love it or hate it but I
did enjoy the hell out of it. I wouldn't say it's technically superior to the
glossy but pointless remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but with its
comic book stylings and far-out freaky characters and mish mash of monster
lore, it is certainly more original. This year has seen a resurgence of
classical horror motifs, along with another key ingredient long missing from
hardcore exploitation- gratuitous nudity. Even the horrendous House of the
Dead had some juicy skinny dipping scenes. Cabin Fever was likewise
over-rated though earnest and amusing, with its share of nubile nekkidness.
Even Freddy Vs Jason - better than expected, considering I'm not a fan
of either franchise - contained an extraneous shower scene, the hallmark of
quality trash. Rob Zombie is a longtime advocate of old school sleaze
and matinee monsters, and his love of the genres is clearly evident and in
celebration throughout his debut flick, which I trust won't be his last. Not a
masterpiece, but a giant step in the right direction - backwards. Plus he does
for Sid Haig what Tarantino just did for Sonny Chiba -brought a
70s drive-in legend back into the limelight. Bravo. Look for Rob's excellent
new comic book too, Spookshow International. RUNNER UP: Wrong
Turn, surprisingly creepy, like a really good episode of The X
Files.
- DAREDEVIL
Okay, it has Ben
Affleck, the whitest movie star since - God, I don't know who's as white as
this guy, except maybe Tom Cruise, they both make Jimmy Stewart look
like Isaac Hayes by comparison - playing a pivotal Marvel superhero, but
you know what? He gets the job done. There are revisionist changes in the
costume and origin story and the especially with the villains, though both
Kingpin and Bullseye are superbly realized for my money. What's her name who
plays Elektra needs some booty on her (hey, where's J-Lo when you need her?),
but in essence, this captured the dark tone and noir feel of the original comic
book, and that's good enough for me.
- WONDERLAND
I'm including this
one just because I was so surprised by how well done it is, despite bad reviews
and lackluster box office. I didn't know anything about the murders at the core
of the story, attracted by the prurient presence of John Holmes (Val
Kilmer, excellent once again) mixed up with drugs, sex and rock ?n' roll.
Those elements are all present, but unlike Boogie Nights, it never
ventures into a parody or even an expose of the porn world, instead presenting
the murky facts as they're recorded from various perspectives, in classic film
noir multiple flashback tradition. This one fits into a new genre of Sleazy
Celebrity Biopics - the Chuck Barris story Confessions of a Dangerous
Mind would've made my Top 10 of this year, but it came out last year, even
though I didn't see it till recently, and the Bob Crane Story Auto
Focus did make my Top 10 of 2002. This isn't as entertaining as either
of those, but just as competent. Check it out, you'll be surprised. Maybe.
I still haven't seen
Mystic
River or the American version of The Singing Detective yet, but I'm looking
forward to both. Yea, movie-wise, it was a very good year. Speaking of
which...
THE THRILLVILLIAN CANDIATE
My publicly acknowledged idol Frank Sinatra used to
be a serious Lefty - at a time when it was not fashionable, the 40s and 50s -
and was an acknowledged early champion of
civil rights. He even won the
NAACP Lifetime Achievement
Award in (I believe) 1987. But around the time his career began slipping he
suddenly lurched rightward and started golfing with Tricky Dick and worse,
Ronnie Reagan - both men he once avidly campaigned
against. And Elvis
Presley, who once shook up the establishment with his raunchy,
rebellious behavior,
posed for one of the most famous photo ops in history with Nixon
- the uptight enemy of Rock n' Rollers everywhere. Elvis even vowed to help
Dickie's war on the drug culture. (Of course, we should note the ironic fact
that The King was pretty stoned at the time.) How, then, as a conscientious
liberal, do I justify my love of these icons? I don't have to. Music speaks
louder than actions. I'd vote for either one for President (even though they're
forever The Chairman and The King). Especially now.
Frank's mystique lingers in the culture. There's that
Radio City Music Hall
concert, sort of like the big screen "Elvis Tour" with live musicians on a
stage playing along with projected images of the singer. And recently Reprise
released "Live and
Swingin': The Ultimate Rat Pack Collection," featuring both a CD of
a Chicago concert circa 1962 and the long-awaited DVD release of the TV special
from 1965 hosted by
Johnny
Carson, featuring the boys at their best, backed by Count Basie and his
Orchestra. These are thrilling documents of timeless legends in their
prime - stuff you couldn't own back when they were actually recorded.
My annual tribute to St. Francis, FRANK'S BIRTHDAY PARTY (he was born
December
12, 1915,
though we're celebrating it one day early at
The Parkway
since it's a Thursday, on the December 11 at 9PM) this year features one of his
best and most popular flicks, John Frankenheimer's
THE MANCHURIAN CANDIATE (1962), a movie that Frank
himself pulled out of circulation for years following the assassination of his
former friend JFK, since of course it deals with a presidential assassination
attempt. It's being remade with Denzel Washington. I like Denzel, but don't see
the reason it needs to be re-made with anyone. However, I won't be picketing
it, so relax. I'll just be showing the original. Also on the
thrill-bill is a special live performance
by our new pals Johnny and Gin Atomic of THE ATOMIC LOUNGE SHOW
(www.johnnyatomic.com),
all the way from Santa Rosa. Monica and I met this swingin' couple at a Rat
Pack Tribute show at the Lake Merritt Hotel earlier this year. They're our
North Bay Doppelgangers, right down to the over-sized martini glass Johnny uses
for his gig. They are the Louis and Keely/Steve and Eydie of the
21st century, and they will be paying musical tribute to Ol' Blue
Eyes before the screening. Don't miss this party, hipsters.
I actually witnessed the Rat Pack in action during their final
tour when it opened at the Oakland Coliseum in 1988. Dino dropped out soon after due to
exhaustion and apathy, but still, they all were in great form and totally
opened my eyes to a whole new world. I bought my first sharkskin soon after.
They inspired me to turn my life around and start Livin' the High Life, rather
than just sitting at home alone crying in the dark. That means more to me than
who they supported in the last presidential election. They campaigned for the
Good Life, and I voted to start living it. Now that's a cause I can get
behind.
NEXT MONTH:
ANN-MARGROCKS!!
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